NEW YORK CITY – BLOG HER 2012

In two weeks time I’ll be on a Qantas flight out of Australia and New York bound. I’ll be attending the Blog Her Conference for 2 days and I’ll be spending the other 10 days playing tourist.

This is the first time I’m going to spend more than a few days away from Mr M and the kids.  Over the years I’ve tried to get away for a couple of days on my own or with my friends just to reset.

To be honest, I’m surprised I’ve lasted this long without a longer solo holiday. You see when we got married 12 years ago I told Mr M that I like being on my own.  I don’t know if I was born this way or being on my own is just something I got so used to when I was living with my parents that it just became me.

Mr M understood my need for solitude.  He also told that he’s the opposite.

Last year when he travelled to New York with his business partner he told me over the phone that his trip would have been far more enjoyable if I had been there with him.

At the time I was thinking “hell, given the chance I would travel on my own”. It kind of made me feel guilty; maybe a little bit selfish.

But here I am 2 weeks out starting to get ready. The thing about “being a busy mum” a monumental event, even though you know it’s coming, tends to be put on the backburner. There are so many things to do in between.

So the realization is setting in. I’m going away on my own.  I’ll be turning to wave goodbye to Mr M and my kids as I enter customs.  And for the first time ever I’m starting to think, maybe I don’t want to go on my own, without my little family. Here’s a realization I wasn’t expecting.  Not because I’m all of a sudden scared about travelling on my own, it’s about shared experiences.

I am, though, looking forward to the time to just breathe. People ask me what I have planned. I have nothing planned. I’m going to wake up in the morning walk out of the hotel and just walk. It’s the first time since becoming a mum that I don’t need to plan ANYTHING.  That thought alone makes me light on my feet.

My very Greek mother, of course, lost her mind when I told her about my trip.

“Who will look after the kids?”

“Why Mr M of course,” I reply.

“He’s going to cook and clean and take the kids to school?”

“Why yes Mother,” I say. “You forget, I didn’t marry dad,” I say with a smile on my face.

And that conversation just snapped me back into place.

Because I realized that I might not be making shared experiences with my family in New York but my family will be making shared experiences here in Sydney without me. And that’s a life lesson for us all.

12 Comments

  • At 2012.07.16 13:50, Danielle said:

    I think that this time away will be good for both me AND my husband. I don’t know if he quite realizes exactly how much I do while home with our two kids. And I think of this as a trip to help me grow whereas we can plan a family trip later on down the line.

    I guess I’m just trying to say that I know where you’re coming from and I know you’ll make the best of your trip!

    • At 2012.07.16 14:13, Maria said:

      Hi Danielle,

      The other thing I found when I’ve gone away is the kids realise that their father is actually more capable than they realise. They are just so used to coming to me for help because I work from home it’s just habit for them. And for me too. We all fall into this groove so shaking things up is going to be great.

      Cannot wait to get to Blog Her.

      Thanks for the visit and the comment.

      Love & stuff
      Mrs M

    • At 2012.07.16 14:03, Costa K said:

      My mum feels the same way when Louise just goes out to the gym!

      • At 2012.07.16 14:08, Maria said:

        Both our mum’s are nuts!! :-)

        I considered sparing her the worry but I’m away when it’s dad’s birthday. I reckon I’ll hear his reaction all the way from NYC. 😉

        Thanks for the visit!!!

        Love & stuff
        Mrs M

      • At 2012.07.16 15:38, kirri said:

        Sounds wonderful to me Maria. Have a blast!

        • At 2012.07.17 12:08, Maria said:

          Thanks Kirri. I will.

          Love & stuff
          Mrs M

        • At 2012.07.16 19:19, Marie said:

          I said exactly the same thing when I met Warren. Now, I find myself going out and doing things on my own, partly for the freedom, but mostly so that I can continue to appreciate him when he is around.

          • At 2012.07.17 12:11, Maria said:

            Hi Marie,

            And it just reminds you of who you are. Enzo and I often joke “so what was it that we did on our own?”

            Love & stuff
            Mrs M

          • At 2012.07.18 13:13, Seana Smith said:

            Oh I do love being on my own. Kids and husband were at home/away with us all for three weeks of school holidays and yesterday I felt so, so relieved to have and to hugely enjoy my solitude.

            And I’m a terribly sociable person… but need alone time.

            Am not however going to BlogHer, I do envy you but husband has just gone back to Kurdistan so no can do. He doesn’t manage well alone with four kids for long anyway, though he did do well for the four days I was in Noosa this year. That was fab.

            • At 2012.07.18 13:27, Maria said:

              Hi Seana,

              I’m lucky that my husband is very capable. And the kids don’t rely on me too much with things like getting ready for school. They know the drill. It’s really the toddler that can throw the day’s plans into chaos.

              Thanks for the visit.

              Love & stuff
              Mrs M

            • At 2012.07.30 19:44, Carli said:

              I’m not sure if it was being one of five children but I enjoy my own company too. This gets all sorts of tricky with children and a husband who loves company – I completely understand and just quietly my Italian mother-in-law would have a fit if I went away solo too!

              • At 2012.07.31 23:28, Maria said:

                Hi Carli,

                You could be onto something there. I am only 1 of 3 but come from a very large extended Greek family where there were visitors all the time.

                Love & stuff
                Mrs M

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